Me being an asshole when people ask for the day’s notes from class

At NDSU, much like probably any other university, it was pretty common to get an email from someone who was sick that day, asking if someone in the class can send them the notes. They log onto the university network thing, find the class registry, and send a mass email to every student in the class.

Usually people are kind and just email the notes, even though the offender was probably just getting drunk all day and watching the Caprica marathon. Or maybe that’s just me.

After a while I realized this was a perfect opportunity to screw around and entertain myself, as is everything in life.

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I responded to a request for that day’s Physics notes with an attachment:

It was a text document called “PHYS 120 (101409)” so it looked like the notes, but when you opened it, the only thing it said in the document was “Just kidding”

— — — — — — — — — —

Classmate “Anyone have Physics notes from last Thursday? I was at an appointment.”

A likely excuse. Two days later:

Me “Do you still need the notes? Because I’m not going to send them to you.”

— — — — — — — — — —

Person “Could someone who takes notes on their computer blah blah blah volleyball blah blah blah”

from:adamdesautel@gmail.com
NO EXCUSES
EXCUSES GET YOU NOTHING IN LIFE

Her response:
“If you didn’t want to send me the notes, that’s fine, but you didn’t need to give me such a rude response. Have you ever heard the saying “if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say it at all?”

from:adamdesautel@gmail.com
I was abused as a child and don’t know how to behave properly in normal human conversation

— — — — — — — — — —

One guy with the last name “Donner” emailed the class asking if anyone had found a calculator lying around in the classroom, because he had lost it.

I emailed him and said his other calculator probably ate it.

I didn’t get a response, so after a couple days, I followed up:

from:adamdesautel@gmail.com
GET IT GET IT
CAUSE YOUR LAST NAME IS DONNER

— — — — — — — — — —

Some girl was asking for the notes, and I told her I posted them online and gave her the URL. It was actually a TinyURL.com link that brought her to some ridiculous YouTube video.

I don’t remember what the video was, because the video was removed from YouTube. Here’s the link I sent her: http://tinyurl.com/5adr2k. If you type the destination YouTube URL into the YouTube search bar, you get search results of Britney Spears songs. Yeah, that sounds about right.

— — — — — — — — — —

Classmate “I have been sick with mono and been unable to come to class because I’m so pathetic as a human being”

He didn’t mention what class it was, which always really irritated me. Does he think the people in his class ONLY take that class and no others?

Me “What class?”

Classmate “Physics”

Even then. What if someone is taking that particular physics course because they’re studying physics? That might mean they’re taking more than one.

I didn’t respond. Whiskey doesn’t drink itself, and I have shit to do in life.

Classmate [A couple days later] “were you ever able to locate the chapter 6 part 2 notes and chapter 7 part 2 notes for me? I would greatly appreciate it if you would email them to me. I’d gladly return the favor!! thank you!”

Me “I usually don’t take notes during Physics, actually. I maybe go to class, but usually I just go to the review sessions before each exam and learn everything then. I do the homework by looking the answers up on Wikipedia or by finding some automatic calculation website that does the math problems for me.”

He never responded.

— — — — — — — — — —

When you send out one of these emails, it automatically goes to every student in the class, but nobody else.

Person “I will not be able to make class today could someone please send me the notes for the day?”

Of course, not mentioning the course she’s asking for.

Me “What class?”

Person “physics haha, sorry”

Me “I’m not in that course.”

— — — — — — — — — —

Classmate “Hey just wondering if anyone could send me the notes from this last Monday for HNES 100.”

Me “I dropped the course already, but I can make up some notes in a Word document if you want.”

— — — — — — — — — —

This is the from the photo at the top of this post.

Person “Hey!! I was absent from class on Thursday (9/24) due to being sick 😦 I was just wondering if someone would be kind enough to send me the notes from that day!! I’d greatly appreciate it and I will gladly return the favor if need be! Thanks a lot and have a fantastic day!”

Me “I’ll only send you the notes if you have a written apology to me and the professor, no shorter than six pages, ready to go for the next class period. I will then consider your ridiculous, insulting offer.”

Person “It’s all good… there are some generous people in the class that have already sent me the notes. But thanks for the offer?”

Me “You’re welcome”

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So yeah… it really irritated me when someone would ask for the notes and not say what class they’re requesting. They’ll ask for “Thursday the 24th” but I do take other courses besides the one you are in.

Sometimes I would take the extra time to do a little research, just to mess with them as justice for their crimes. (Why did I mess with the other people who didn’t actually do anything wrong except politely ask for the notes? That’s a question for my therapist to answer.)

In the subject line of the mass email they send out using Campus Connection, there’s always automatically a 4-6 digit code that corresponds to the different courses. But these codes aren’t common knowledge.

Everyone knows what “PHYS 120” or “COMM 200” or “MATH 101” means. That’s obvious. But nobody says “Yeah I just got done with my 183642 course. So much easier than 55021” unless you are literally a robot.

So…

I look at the code in the subject line of the email, log on to Campus Connection, search for the class in the Add Course list where you register for new courses, and figure out what class it’s for. It takes about 3-5 minutes to look each one up.

This was to make sure I knew exactly which notes from which class they were asking for.

And then I would purposely send them my notes from a completely different course.